Waiting for the Big Splash
In the beginning there was supposedly the Big Bang, but no one remembers it anymore.
WAITING FOR THE BIG SPLASH
In the beginning, they say, there was the Big Bang – but no one remembers that anymore. Then stars and planets emerged from cosmic dust. And so it all revolves to this day.
Once upon a time, on one of the less valuable planets, life emerged from water. Which means water must have been formed first. Life spread across the planet and felt increasingly secure, especially when it manifested itself in the form of dinosaurs. Then the dinosaurs became extinct. Their massive bodies rotted, eventually turning into black oil. From oil, humans created plastic, and from plastic, the Chinese humans created miniature dinosaurs. And so it continues to this day.
Meanwhile, civilization arose, because I forgot to add that humans appeared on the planet. First, they were busy with hunting, slitting each other's throats, and raping; Then they invented bricks, airplanes, temples, skyscrapers, inflation, bridges, bathtubs, space rockets, bureaucracy, nail clippers, and a whole host of other unnecessary props. Of course, they still slit throats and raped, but in some places, life became so easy and the unemployment benefits so high that they got bored; they started playing video games, browsing Facebook, or scrawling obscene graffiti on the walls of their temples.
Eventually, their entire civilization became sluggish and sleepy, like an elderly dinosaur whose tail could sweep a third of the stars from the sky. If it only wanted to.
But it didn't want to. Nobody wanted to anything anymore. Merchants didn't want to trade, soldiers didn't want to shoot, men didn't want women.
The last composer smashed his violin on the edge of the piano. The last painter loaded his brush with tubes of paint—like bloody pieces of meat on a skewer—and pierced it in the pristine white canvas on his easel. The last child, not thrown out with the bathwater, placed the plastic dinosaur on the slippery rim of his plastic tub.
The day was sunny, partly cloudy, and the biometrics extremely favorable. The water level was average, and the pressure was normal. Trains and soap operas ran on schedule, and weary employees of glass corporations were just taking a break for a soy latte.
And life came to the cliff. It took a deep breath and howled...