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In the beginning there was supposedly the Big Bang, but no one remembers it anymore.
WAITING FOR THE BIG SPLASH
In the beginning, there was supposedly the Big Bang, but no one remembers it anymore. Then stars and planets formed—and so it all continues to this day. Once upon a time, on one of the planets, life emerged from water. Which means water must have formed first. Life developed on the planet and felt increasingly secure, especially when it manifested itself in the form of dinosaurs. The dinosaurs died out, their bodies turned into crude oil, crude oil was turned into plastic, and from that plastic, the Chinese created dinosaurs. And so it continues to this day. In the meantime, civilization arose, because I forgot to mention that humans appeared on the planet. First, they were busy hunting, slitting each other's throats, and raping; then they invented bricks, airplanes, temples, skyscrapers, inflation, bridges, bathtubs, space rockets, bureaucracy, nail clippers, and a whole host of other unnecessary trinkets. They still slit throats and raped, but in some places life became so easy and the benefits so high that they got bored; they started playing video games, browsing Facebook, or scrawling obscene graffiti on the walls of their temples. Eventually, their entire civilization became sluggish and sleepy, like an elderly dinosaur whose tail could wipe a third of the stars from the sky if it wanted to. But no one cared anymore. Merchants didn't want to trade, soldiers didn't want to shoot, men didn't want women. The last composer smashed his violin on the edge of a piano. The last painter loaded tubes of paint onto his brush like pieces of meat on a skewer, and with that brush, he pierced, like an arrow, the pristine white canvas on his easel. The last child not thrown out with the bathwater placed his plastic dinosaur on the slippery edge of the bathtub. The day was sunny, with moderate cloud cover and favorable biometrics. Water levels were average, and pressure was normal. Trains and soap operas ran on schedule, corporate employees were just taking a latte break. And life stood still. It took a deep breath and howled.